Being a children's pastor I have noticed how often we lie to kids during Bible story time. Oh sure, we don't look at it that way--- we just want to create a happy, safe environment for the kiddies. But the God of the Bible wasn't always safe. Jesus wasn't a stuffed animal surrounded by fuzzy lambs and cartoon suns. In fact Jesus tended to shake things up, step on toes, get in people's faces. The God of the Old Testament used to call down plagues that killed thousands of people in a single day. But it is funny how we only want to give the 'fun' stories like Noah's Ark or Jonah & the Whale. Even the way we tell it is not accurate.
"Well, there was this nice old, grandpa man that built a great big boat and he saved all the cute animals from the rain and when it was all over their was a great big rainbow. Isn't that fun?"
Of course you wouldn't mention the screaming, drowning people outside the boat or the horrific sanitation problems Noah would have had with so many animals on a boat for a few months. Peee-U!
What about the story when Noah builds a vineyard and gets so drunk on wine that he passes out naked in his tent and his kids walk in on him? Yeah, I don't think that one made the curriculum cut.
Yesterday I read a Bible story to some kids about Abraham & Sarah. It ended with "And they named their son Isaac, which means 'laughter' because they were so happy to have a baby!" The End.
Umm, excuse me? What about the part when Sarah lied to God about laughing? She didn't have the faith to believe that even God could give her a baby in her old age and when the angel of the Lord asked why she was laughing she was like, "
"Laughing? Who me? I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't hear any laughing".
and the angel was like, "Uh, yes you did. I was standing right here. I heard you myself with my perfect angel ears!"
Now with a generation raised on Veggietales there is quite a bit of confusion about the reality of stories. I will try to reference something from the Bible like the Battle of Jericho, for instance, and some kid will say, "Oh, I already know that part. Thats when they tried to defend their city with slushies."
Huh?
"Oh you know... the little french peas?"
No, no I do not.
What I do know is that Bob the Tomato should have never have made the cast of Veggietales in the first place since tomatoes are technically a fruit :)
After all, Jesus said it would be better to have a millstone tied around your neck & thrown into the sea than to mislead these little ones!